All over the place

I've been plagued lately with short random thoughts and recollections and I have to write them out so I can quit thinking about them. One cool morning this last week, I was covering up my client with a beach towel after her swim and it looked a bit cape-like so the subject of Superman came up. Doesn't your mind jump right there when you hear the word cape? Thinking about childhood super heroes and dressing up like them led me to thinking of my childhood imaginings. Maybe it was before Superman's time, I don't know, but I used to imagine I was a squirrel. And not a Rocky and Bullwinkle type of squirrel either - just a plain forest creature. Our living room had a generous sized upholstered chair with wide arms that I would crouch on, with my blankie tucked into the waistband of my two piece jammies. It would hang long behind me (think tail) and flip around when I jumped over to other pieces of furniture (think trees). It was fun. I was not the only kid in the family doing that. I'm not sure what age I was but I was small enough to fit under the TV table on a shelf. TVs were almost as big as a washing machine and they sat on squarish stands, table height with a hole in the middle for all the electronic heat to escape.

This week I gave up my 20 year old driver's license for a new updated one with a new updated picture of me on it. Twenty years ago I looked a whole different color than I do now and it was confusing for people, so it was time - nevertheless, I kind of grieved giving up the old one. It was kind of like parting with a piece of history. They should have let me keep it.  But the part of the process that I can't quit thinking about was the vision test I had to take. Keep in mind that I had just been to the optometrist the week before for my yearly vision exam and there was nothing unusual about it. I had my contacts in. Everything was clear and easy to read, until she asked me to tell what was in a row of boxes on the right of the screen. Those boxes were empty, clear and empty, but that was not the right answer. She encouraged me to look harder - at empty boxes?  So, I'm starting to sweat a little at this point because I had told her there would be no issue with my vision test and clearly there seemed to be one. I switched to a different machine and looked at it's empty boxes for a while. She told me to turn my head a little but the empty boxes looked pretty much the same that way too. Patiently, she asked me if I had monovision contacts, which I do, and told me to look harder.  I think the test is for distances greater than the length of one's car - far vision, but my eye whose job it was to see far was the one seeing nothing. When I closed that eye, the near vision eye saw ever so faintly, blurry letters in some of the boxes and when I squinted real hard I was able to guess correctly and pass the test. The scary thing is, evidently there's a bunch of stuff out there that I'm not seeing at all. That's not good. "Oh, don't worry about it. I wasn't going to fail you." she said. I still can't figure it out but you can count on it, I'm going back to the optometrist this week and telling the story to her.

And the last thing I'll write about is my resolution to not buy clothing that I won't ever wear.  That would seem like a no brainer resolution, but if that were true I wouldn't have quite a few things that are now in my closet. I was looking for something to wear with a skirt this morning and since it was cool I went to the long sleeved tops and saw my colorful array of L.L. Bean turtleneck knits. Was I so enamored with the quality of L.L.Bean and so intoxicated with my ability to purchase them that I went totally out of my mind? What was I thinking? It's been ten years since I've wanted anything warm around my neck. Really, not even a round crew neck is comfortable. I need a V neck, a couple buttons I can undo, or something that can be removed (modestly of course) when I have a temperature surge. I made myself wear one today out of guilt. I also have quite a few suit jackets - same problem. Suit, jacket - I get warm just thinking the words. The only place I can wear them is in the freezer section of the supermarket, but I always forget to dress up when I go grocery shopping. How about you?

Well, I just had to say these things. Now I can rest peacefully tonight.