Time

it's time, give me a minute of your time, it's timeless, it's timely, forgotten in time, timed-out, half time, double time, just in time...  Sitting up there in Chicago waiting for time to pass, I knew that I would probably be sitting at home again soon wondering about the reality of things past.and here I am, doing just that. What on earth is time? We know how to measure it in different ways, but what is it really? I think it is a hard thing to answer, but even harder is thinking about time being created, and what it was like before it was created.  Sometimes when I can't find answers to my questions about God I think about him being in a timeless world where everything happens at once and it helps me know that I don't know very much about God at all. As weird as time is, it's actually a simpler way of living than anything else I can imagine and that's why I think God put us in time. It's sort of his gift to us when things are hard - we can know they won't last forever. And the good things we don't want to end? Well, if things were always good, we'd say good compared to what? Maybe this variety of good times and bad times and in betweens is what makes us change and grow, especially if we believe that there is purpose to be found in this strange collection of seconds, minutes, hours, days, years.

I never intended to eat six of my Lindor dark chocolate truffles, but a wrapper count shows that it happened. I finished the bag which is sooo easy to do. When I get done with a hard thing, like the trip to Chicago, I tend to max out on relief items. I am just so relieved to be sleeping in my own bed, driving my own car, finding something in my refrigerator (other than all the vegetables that rot/dry up while I'm gone), making more of my own decisions, petting my cat... Even cleaning and doing laundry seem somewhat precious to me. And today, since I am planning my second Thanksgiving this one with Julie, I baked pumpkin pies and put my tablecloth with pretty autumn leaves on the table.

We got home last night around 6:30 and I gave all the passengers waiting at the gate one last show as I stripped the packing and duct tape off Tanisha's electric chair and put it back together again. I even got a couple volunteers who thought it was so interesting what I was doing that they had to join me.  I was relieved that I got the parts all joined again and that it worked when I put Tanisha in it.  She makes such a big deal about it costing $30,000 and how careful we should all be when we touch it.  I was relieved when she and all her stuff were in the van with Michelle and leaving the airport - without me.  I was glad Dennis came to pick me up and take me home. And I was glad I got to sleep till 7 this morning before Tanisha called and asked me to come to work at 9:30.

Will the time ever come when we have more help? Will the time ever come when I will feel free to leave Scottie's employment? Will I instead be going back to Chicago again if her mom dies and there is a funeral to attend? I know I can count on time making changes in my life even if I don't know what the changes will be. And when I think of God being a constant, because he says he doesn't change it makes some sense to me, because he doesn't live in time like I do. It's just a thought...